The Bitter Sting of Rejection
Rejection hurts. That’s a fact of life. Whether it’s a rejection from that cute girl you hoped to take to the school formal, or losing out on that job you so desperately wanted.
It’s no different with writing. Whether experienced pro or beginner, every time you get that email or letter containing those dreaded words “…but we regret to inform you that…” you can’t help but feel bitter and sad.
I recently received a rejection from an anthology I had hoped to get into (obviously, or I wouldn’t have submitted). Like every story, I had worked hard on it and thought it had a damn good chance of getting in. But it was not to be. Ah well, shit happens and all that.
But it occurred to me, one day whilst shelving children’s books at the library (yes, these are the things I contemplate as I shove Enid Blyton books into their proper spot); there are stages of grief after getting a story rejection.
Well at least, there are for me.
Bear with me here.
The first is shock. Most times I stare at the computer screen or at the letter for a long time, just trying to process what it is the words were saying (namely – rejected!!).
Then comes anger. “Fuck you, it was a great story! You’re just too damn idiotic not to recognise the brilliance of my work. You’re just interested in by-the-numbers crap written by your mates, not my masterpiece.” And so on and so forth. You get the idea.
Next comes doubt and self pity. “Was it any good? Maybe it really was crap. Oh shit, what am I doing writing – I’m a hack. They were right. I’m never submitting a story ever again.”
Lastly, is reason and acceptance. You realise that more than likely, it wasn’t that the story was a steaming pile of dog-turds (well maybe that’s the case sometimes), but that it simply wasn’t the right story for that particular antho/magazine etc. Life goes on and “hey, I just thought of another great idea for a story…”
I go through these stages every time I get a rejection. I think next time it’ll be different, but most of the time, it’s not. Sometimes the stages come in rapid succession; I’ll go from the second to the third in a matter of minutes. Other times it might take days to run the course.
But in the end, I get over the rejection, file it away with all the others, and continue writing.
Because if you’re a writer, that’s what you do.
Yes rejection hurts, but it’s part of the business. It’s part of any business and you just have to learn to live with it.
It makes the acceptances that much sweeter.
It’s no different with writing. Whether experienced pro or beginner, every time you get that email or letter containing those dreaded words “…but we regret to inform you that…” you can’t help but feel bitter and sad.
I recently received a rejection from an anthology I had hoped to get into (obviously, or I wouldn’t have submitted). Like every story, I had worked hard on it and thought it had a damn good chance of getting in. But it was not to be. Ah well, shit happens and all that.
But it occurred to me, one day whilst shelving children’s books at the library (yes, these are the things I contemplate as I shove Enid Blyton books into their proper spot); there are stages of grief after getting a story rejection.
Well at least, there are for me.
Bear with me here.
The first is shock. Most times I stare at the computer screen or at the letter for a long time, just trying to process what it is the words were saying (namely – rejected!!).
Then comes anger. “Fuck you, it was a great story! You’re just too damn idiotic not to recognise the brilliance of my work. You’re just interested in by-the-numbers crap written by your mates, not my masterpiece.” And so on and so forth. You get the idea.
Next comes doubt and self pity. “Was it any good? Maybe it really was crap. Oh shit, what am I doing writing – I’m a hack. They were right. I’m never submitting a story ever again.”
Lastly, is reason and acceptance. You realise that more than likely, it wasn’t that the story was a steaming pile of dog-turds (well maybe that’s the case sometimes), but that it simply wasn’t the right story for that particular antho/magazine etc. Life goes on and “hey, I just thought of another great idea for a story…”
I go through these stages every time I get a rejection. I think next time it’ll be different, but most of the time, it’s not. Sometimes the stages come in rapid succession; I’ll go from the second to the third in a matter of minutes. Other times it might take days to run the course.
But in the end, I get over the rejection, file it away with all the others, and continue writing.
Because if you’re a writer, that’s what you do.
Yes rejection hurts, but it’s part of the business. It’s part of any business and you just have to learn to live with it.
It makes the acceptances that much sweeter.
posted by BrettMcBean at 7:25 PM
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